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Secrets of a Formerly Miserable Wife
Author Diane England, Ph.D. has the credentials you expect, plus she has 
empathy and speaks from the heart because she has been there, too.

“Discover Why, as the Wife of a Narcissistic and Abusive Man, You Might Benefit
from an Antidepressant”
(And it’s more than because depression hurts)

 Have you considered that because you’re living with a man suffering from unhealthy levels of narcissism who probably has addictions and engages in at least emotional abuse and verbal abuse, that your body and mind are constant victims of stress, anxiety, and depression? Well, just think about it. When you live with a narcissist who slings emotional abuse and verbal abuse at you regularly, you’re living in an environment of chronic stress.

Also, are you constantly anxious, trying to determine how to ward off that next attack? You probably also feel worn out and done in. Actually, you might display the helplessness and hopelessness of depression.

Did you know that chronic stress, anxiety, and depression have been linked to death of neurons in a part of the brain called the hippocampus? It’s true. Studies have shown that the hippocampus in depressed individuals is ten to twenty percent smaller than normal. This atrophy of the hippocampus is probably due to the death of neurons, as well as the fact new ones aren’t birthed through a process called neurogenesis.

It seems these new cells don’t develop because of chronic stress. See, chronic stress promotes the release of steroids. In turn, steroids inhibit neurogenesis.

This isn’t good news, certainly. After all, this section of the brain impacts memory and memory storage. But it also impacts your ability to learn. Well, scientists doing brain research also now believe that neurogenesis is important in mood regulation. Thus, when it isn’t occurring, a person is apt to become depressed. When neurogenesis starts to occur again, mood is elevated. (You can learn more regarding how negative emotions impact your brain by reading my article, “Why Living with a Narcissistic Man who Engages in Emotional Abuse and Verbal Abuse Harms Your Brain.” It’s available at this website).

There’s some good news, though. See, there are ways to promote the growth of new neurons. One way is to take an antidepressant, probably one of the serotonin selective reuptake inhibitors, or SSRIs. (Talk to your physician and follow his or her advice, however). Research with mice demonstrated that such an antidepressant stimulated neurogenesis. After neurogenesis occurred, the mood of the mice also lifted.

Neurons communicate by secreting messenger chemicals called neurotransmitters. One neurotransmitter is serotonin. It, as well as the other neurotransmitters, crosses the synaptic gulf between cells. These then bind to receptors on neighboring cell membranes. Because medications which enhance this type of binding of serotonin to its receptors (SSRIs) have been successful in the treatment of anxiety and depression, we’ve suspected these receptors played an important role in regulating emotions. However, we didn’t understand what they did or why they worked.

Now, neuroscientists and psychologists believe they have their answer: Antidepressants promote neurogenesis. And again, the process of neurogenesis causes mood to lift, reducing the depression.

This research also suggests why it takes several weeks for antidepressants to start working. As one of the scientists involved in these research studies has pointed out, if antidepressants work by stimulating the production of new neurons, there's going to be a built-in delay since stem cells must divide, differentiate, migrate, and establish connections with post-synaptic targets. This process takes a few weeks.

Of course, this is about the amount of time people must take the antidepressant before experiencing any effects. These research findings lend credence to the thinking that these antidepressants promote neurogenesis.

Further study is yet needed before we can say with certainty that neurogenesis causes negative emotions to lift, or that this process is needed to maintain a healthy emotional state. Bu it appears strategies aimed at stimulating neurogenesis in the hippocampus could provide novel avenues for the treatment of anxiety and depressive disorders in humans.

So, what are some other ways to promote neurogenesis? Research with mice suggests that regular physical exercise such as running promotes neurogenesis. And certainly, we know that depressed people who start an aerobic exercise program often see their spirits lift. Now, we assumed this was due to the release of endorphins, or chemicals that make a person feel good or provide a natural high. But maybe those who’ve engaged in aerobic exercise always felt better and believed they thought more clearly because in actuality, they were also developing new neurons in the hippocampus.

Again, the research isn’t there yet where we can state this for a fact that this is what happens. However, we already know that exercise is great for you, providing it isn’t done to the extreme, of course. (This is just more reason to do what you already know you should do).

This research suggests some other important things as well.  For example, do everything you can to minimize the chronic stress in your life. Remember, it’s hurting not only your brain, but the rest of your body, too. Thus, of course your health is going to be affected, although the impact might not be immediate. 

To better manage stress, do those things you’ve already so often heard you should do such as exercise, eat a healthy diet, get enough sleep, and avoid alcohol. After all, while red wine might protect your heart, neuroscientists are learning that alcohol seems to interfere with neurogenesis.

Disclaimer: This how-to and self-help relationship advice and information for women about narcissism, addictions and abuse should be considered educational or inspirational—a guide or directory to things to consider and inform questions to ask a professional you contact for sound advice. It is not a substitute for marriage counseling, individual therapy, or legal advice. Women coping with domestic violence such as emotional abuse, verbal abuse, and/or sexual abuse—even where no physical abuse is present—are encouraged to seek professional help for treatment of depression, anxiety, self esteem, and other likely associated issues.

© 2007, Benefiting Women, LLC.

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